Three…two…one,
That’s it, we’re done.
No more chances,
No more glances,
We’ve had our fun.
We started hot,
But now we’re not.
Cooling desires
Turned us into liars,
Neither thinking we’d be caught.
Good-bye my lover,
No need to hover.
Let’s both be on our way,
Nothing more to say,
We’ve no secrets left to discover.
I’ll think of you fondly,
I could say,
But that would be a lie.
Rather I’ll note,
That as regrets go,
You’re fairly far down the line.
This post is a response to a writing prompt from Write On Edge: "This week, we’d like you to write a post – fiction or creative non-fiction – which begins with a countdown. “Three, two, one.” You pick what the countdown is for. The ideas above are just suggestions. Use your imagination and have fun with it!"
In this poem I was aiming for a sense of cold dismissal at the end of a relationship between two people, neither of whom have behaved particularly well. What were your impressions? Let me know in the comments!
It's cute...
ReplyDeletePoetry is an interesting side tack for you...
I like the poetic adios. No hard feelings...heck, no remaining feelings at all. Nice!
ReplyDeleteI love it when a prompt inspires poetry! I like the contrast here between the jaunty rhythm and meter and the dark subject matter. Well done.
ReplyDeleteNice, I like it. :)
ReplyDeleteHonestConvoGal completely stole my point ;P. I agree with her that the contrast between a jaunty meter and a dark subject matter makes for a captivating piece.
ReplyDeleteI love it!! No hard feelings... seems it was that way for both parties!
ReplyDeleteThis was brillantly done--I could even hear the tone, as if this was spoken aloud.
ReplyDeleteI love your take on the prompt. The poem is awesome.
ReplyDeleteI think you did exactly what you set out to do! And I'm always a fan of a good rhyming scheme. ;-) Great stuff!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed it. It definitely works as a "cold" good bye where the feelings have evaporated
ReplyDeleteI like it -- especially after I read it out loud and gave it the right tone of voice...
ReplyDeleteHa! That's awesome.
ReplyDeleteI would hate to be on the end of such a missive, but I like the detached, yet structured format.
I love poems. Especially when it's a "ta-ta loser" feel to it! Good take on the prompt. I enjoyed the rhythm to this!
ReplyDeleteA big thank you to everyone who took the time to read and comment! Now I'm feeling bad that I haven't had a chance to read any other posts...so I'm off to read and comment! See you there!
ReplyDelete